In order to see less of what you’re not interested in, TikTok recommends long-pressing on videos and simply hitting the “not interested” button to remould your FYP. I briefly considered this approach but worried that by smacking the algorithm whenever it misbehaved I might end up getting bounced to some weird random corner of the app, like sheep-shearing TikTok. I decided this tactic would be cheating, but still resolved to take a more proactive approach the next day.
Date Around three
Rather than trust the algorithm, I decided to take matters into my own hands and actively look for content more befitting the state of my love life, or lack thereof. As I ventured for the first time into the Explore section of the app, I clocked my suggested searches: “boyfriend gift ideas,” “cuddles with boyfriend,” “boyfriend appreciation.” For fuck’s sake. I had never searched for any of these things in my life yet TikTok was basically calling me a simp to my face. I ignored the slander and instead used the manual search option to find and furiously engage with every video I could under hashtags like #breakup, #heartbreak, and #dumped.
As it turned out, I was late to the party: break up TikTok is basically among the many app’s really active subcultures (the #breakup hashtag alone has over 9 billion views). It was here I found weepy, snivvily solace among dozens of Gen Z-ers documenting their breakups day-by-day by filming by themselves weeping, mulling more the shed lovers, or doling away sobering recommendations.
Was this self care or self-destructive? I wondered. To answer that, I reached out to Gillian Myhill, a sex and relationship expert who once ran her own cena adventist singles tech company. We agreed algorithms can be cruel things and she assured me it wasn’t unnatural to be annoyed by the couples polluting my FYP, rather, “you’re more in tune to it” when you’ve been through a breakup. “You have a different tint on your vision,” she said.
So is delving to the #break up TikTok proper coping apparatus, next? “I think once the human beings we discover peace and quiet or understanding knowing we’re not the only real of these, to know we’re not alone – there are other people dealing with such things,” Gillian told me. “There can be a kind of companionship you can find by this. Often if you find yourself sad you should be up to people that understand the serious pain otherwise who happen to be going through they. It’s part of new recovery process where you go-away and you will eat your own injuries – and you will a way you can think on the connection would be to talk to most other humans about your problems along with your skills.”
Go out Five
My foray into the miserable world of breakup content seemed to have worked. Perhaps spurred on by the latest lso are-launch of Taylor Swift’s disastrous separation record album Red-colored, 12 videos about the now painfully relatable “All Too Well” jumped up at me. In some of them, women joked throughout the breaking up along with their men for the sole purpose of fully immersing themselves in the song’s much anticipated 10-minute version (I mean. be careful what you wish for). Maybe TikTok was just reflecting the cultural moment as it should, or maybe it was finally reading the room. To keep the momentum going, I doubled back through my liked videos and forwarded all the sad ones onto my friends for good measure. In Taylor’s words, this was exhausting.
I was not the first individual have this problem. Lydia Venn, twenty-four, an other TikTok representative who experienced a separation earlier this seasons, common my personal serious pain. “To what I remember it definitely decided the fresh algorithm try targeted to films I might watched during a relationship,” she remembered. “I had to change my formula therefore i would not be shown her or him because it’s without a doubt not really what we want to find in the midst of a separation.”